


Love At First Bite

by littleberd



Category: Detentionaire (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Banter, Barista Biffy, Biffy just..., Biffy the bakerman, Biffy the bloodhound, FOOD!!!, Fluff, Funny, I'm starving right now, Lee is working part-time because he's going to college, M/M, Poor Lee, Sass, Slow Burn, and runs into people as fast as he can, and some witty quips if I can pull that off, as are all my typical fics, but I'm making that sacrifice!!, funny traditions I completely made up, korean homophobia, no words sometimes, not on purpose of course, okay not entirely but it's pretty funny, sad family background, so this is torturous to write, very funny, who knitts sweaters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-11
Updated: 2017-01-11
Packaged: 2018-09-16 19:59:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9287555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleberd/pseuds/littleberd
Summary: "Why the heck is this guy so obsessed over my Date squares?"





	

Hi, I'm Lee Ping and I work at my family's grocery store as a part-timer. My mom is always on the front lines, she isn't the store manager for nothing, and my dad is always in the office buying stocks and keeping the little _Ping-Ping Asian Specialty Grocer_ afloat in the big bad city of Ottawa. I just take care of the odd jobs, namely the register, restocking, and the restrooms... 

Lee sighs as he puts the upteenth chicken ramen cup on the shelf, he looks back and sees that the shrimp and lime cups are still there. No one had bought any, which he couldn't really fault since that shit was nasty. The bad thing about it is that when something didn't sell before it's last few days before it's expiration date... to save on expenses it would be the family meal. His dad had made the mistake of buying it in bulk because it came along with the chicken ramen cups which were selling like money trees in comparison.

With a grumble of aggravation Lee goes to the backdoor for his lunch break. Taking out his lunch he had made this morning, along with some of his homemade dessert, and opens the door to go to his secret eating area. Jumping a fence or two he walks to the local park and sets his paper bag on a remote stone step under the shade of a summertime weeping willow. Lee takes a bite out of his mayonnaise chicken and tomato sandwich, gulping it down with a Lipton peach tea, which, he soon finds out has the consistency of syrup. Lee gags at his drinks taste, quickly capping that wretched drink and eating his sandwich to take the taste away, but then he bites into a large portion of fat amd slime rather than chicken and tomato. Lee spits it out faster than he had eaten it.

Lee looks at the remains of his lunch in disgust, "The healthiest thing to eat is my damn dessert... oh the joys of being a poor part-timer college student..."

Ping takes out his plastic baggy with five or six of his best work. Soft golden crumbs with oats, and a variety of nuts glazed with sugar and honey sandwiches the thick, purple red, rich and tart date jelly. Lee practically salivates at the sight, but then he also catches a glance at his watch.

"Oh shit!" Lee yells, putting the tea in the paper bag and dumping it in the nearest trash can. He gently cradles his decadent creation to his chest, racing out of the park.

**THUMP!**

Lee swears his vision goes fuzzy as he sailed through the air and landed in a mulberry bush off the path a good few yards away. The living wall that charged at him slams to a stop, skidding on his feet for a moment or two, the beefy, beanie wearing body builder charges at him. Lee startles and covers his face in a pitiful attempt at some sort of defense. But instead of a second body slam from a raging monster truck he gets help out of the vegetation with the gentleness he never expected from such thickly callused hands.

"Sorry dude, didn't mean to send you flying. But, uh..." The guys stops, seeing the purple red smear of the remains of Lee's dessert on his shirt and covering the meditating decal cat. He takes a good chunk of the sweet corpse and swallows it in one gulp, "WOW! Where did you find this Date Square? Holy crap!! This is better than Kimmie's!!! Dude! Tell me where you got these from please!!!"

Lee blinks up at the hulking and nerding food geek in front of him, Lee stutters out a weak, "C-can't, I m-made it." Before weaving around the fast moving TANK, and making it back to the family business with half a second to spare, huffing and sweating from exertion. 

"LEE! Get up here! We have customer and it school rush! Go to register and ring them up!" His mother demands, yelling in broken English over the quickly forming crowd, handling a good dozen or so customers of her own. Lee races over with what little fumes he has left, ringing up customer after customer, he doesn't even focus on them, just doing his mechanical duty.

"Hah! Thought I smelled rice wine and Gochugaru! Date Square! Give me your recipe man! Please?!?!" The menace he had forgotten about pleads before him, the line of waiting and impatient customers is growing by the second. 

"S-sorry, if you're not buying anything please step out of line." Lee tries, eyeing the ever increasing work load behind him.

"Lee Ping! What is hold-up!? Must be faster than this!" His mom yells over the grumbling impatient masses. Lee gulps a bit of family history coming to the front of his mind.

_"Halmeoni! Can I give Cam some Date Squares?" Lee asks, wanting so very badly to share his favorite treat with his best friend._

_"No-no Little Lee-Lee, only share with bride on marry day!" His traditional ancient Halmeoni declares while knitting a red scarf for him in her wooden straight-backed chair._

_Lee Ping pouts as much as he can with his chubby cheeked, string bean, 10-year-old body, "I'm not gonna marry Cam! He won't even let me hold any of his jewelry anyway, why would he fork over a ring?"_

_"My grandson is not 퀴어!!! You can only give to family members and bride-to-be! That's rule!" She proclaimed. So he attempted to side step her rejection by asking his mother._

_"Eomma! Can I give Cam a date square?" Lee asks, running to his mother who is pouring over a coupon book._

_"You hear your Halmeoni, she say no, and no means no." His mother says brushing her son off._

_"Appa would let me! It doesn't mean the same thing here as it means in Korea!" Lee argues._

_"I chisik! Respect your elders! And K'aenada jujube square has same meaning as Puk-han Jujube square! It has Matrimony meaning! So don't give sweet away, means you want to court your friend. You give recipe before marriage and Halmeoni will beat you with wooden spoon little punk!"_

"LEE PING!!! Ring up customer right now young man!!" His mother yells, turning her cashier sign off and briskly walking towards him.

"Look, I can't give you the recipe! But I can make some for you alright? Ju-just don't mention it around my mom okay? Now you've really got to go unless you're not buying anything!" Lee whispers, shoving the rebuffed and spluttering 200 lb. man out of the way and getting his next customer. The man takes a card out of his pocket and slips it into his pocket without another word.

His mother glowers at the guy as he walks out the door and returns to her station once she's seen that the discrepancy has been dealt with. Only once he's clocked out does he dare bring out the card. 

Biffy T. Goldstein  
613-589-8873  
Owner of  
Yarn Cat Cafe 

"Why the heck is this guy so obsessed with my Date Squares?"

**Author's Note:**

> halmeoni - grandma  
> 퀴어 -queer  
> eomma - mom  
> appa - dad  
> i chasik - this brat  
> jujube- date (the fruit)  
> k'aenada - Canada  
> puk-han - North Korea  
> Gochugaru - korean chili powder


End file.
